What Are We Aiming For?
When I was learning how to drive a car, I developed a bad habit of looking at the road immediately in front of the hood. As I focused hard on the line to the left and the shoulder to the right, I ended up bouncing back and forth between the two, overcorrecting with micro adjustments constantly. The harder I focused, the more I weaved left and right, pin-balling between the lines – I couldn’t keep it steady.
My dad taught me to lift my gaze up ahead, focusing farther down the road instead of right in front of the car. Amazingly, when I shifted my focus farther ahead and kept the lines in my peripheral vision instead, I held steady between them without looking directly at them. My dad taught me the value of focusing your eyes on where you’re headed, to hold steady on the way.
Heart & Soul
Too often as parents and homeschoolers, we develop the same bad habits. We focus on the milestones and the guidelines, overcorrecting this and micro-adjusting that, and (exhausted) we pinball down the road only looking at what is directly in front of us. “Following the guidelines” is not the destination.
As parents, our “finish line” is much farther ahead. All of the milestones and guidelines are aiming us at that goal line (raising tiny people into full grown people) and THAT is where we must focus as we travel this road.
We are aiming beyond the academics. We are aiming for their hearts and souls.
Why I Homeschool
First, what I’m **not** doing. I don’t homeschool because I didn’t have a good public school experience, or because I don’t like our local public school, out of fear, or out of pride. In fact, I had a great school experience, we have a wonderful local school system, I know that homeschooling doesn’t eliminate fear, and I’m too well aware of my faults to be too proud.
Rather, I homeschool because the childhood years shape so much more than academics.
And I don’t mean just the preschool and kindergarten years – I’m talking birth to adulthood. All the childhood years.
Childhood is where so much of who we become begins to take shape. It’s where we learn how to work hard and how to rest, how to handle disappointment, how to treat people who frustrate us, how to see ourselves, how to make decisions, and what we believe is true and worth pursuing. It’s where character is practiced, values become convictions, and faith moves from something we’ve been told into something we have to wrestle with and eventually own for ourselves.
What does the have to do with homeschooling?
Everything.
Now don’t get me wrong. I am NOT saying that publicly schooled kids won’t develop these skills, or their parents won’t be able to teach this things, or that homeschooling is the only way.
What I AM saying is that character, heart, soul,.. these things are taught through a lot of time and proximity – and having your kids away at school all day only makes it more challenging. Not impossible, just harder.
On the flip side: I am also NOT saying that homeschooling is easy, or makes training your kids hearts and minds easier. I’m only saying that it gives you more time and proximity.
Homeschooling provides an opportunity to pour into your child’s education with more than simply academics. For me personally, I want more opportunities than what I would get at breakfast and dinner. One day my kids will move out (two of them already have) and I know that my one on one time is limited. I feel the clock ticking.
The Real Reason I Homeschool
Aim and release.
In archery, the first thing an archer does is take his stance, planting his feet and positioning his body toward the target. He nocks the arrow and sets his grip — firm, but not too tight. He raises the bow, draws the string steadily, and finds his anchor: that familiar, consistent place he returns to each time he draws. Then he fixes his eyes on the target.
He breathes.
And he releases.
Parenting feels a lot like that to me.
We take our stance. We decide where we stand and what we believe. We hold our children firmly, but not so tightly that we forget they were never ours to control. We anchor ourselves again and again in the truths and values we want to pass down. And through all of the lessons and milestones and ordinary days, we keep our eyes on where we’re aiming.
Because eventually, we release.
That’s the real reason I homeschool.
Not for targets or guidelines or goals. Not for test scores or perfection. I homeschool for my kids. For the precious years I have to teach them, know them, guide them, and prepare them for the day when my job is no longer to hold the bow.
My legacy.
My arrows.
What are you aiming for?
